JURY DUTY: Shout Out

Shout out to all my old co-workers: "T", Kelly, Shauna, and the Penis Crew! I know you guys are reading this so I have to tell you about my new work environment. Hilarious! Just picture our Ops Center with about 10 more characters. We have a Santa Clause, a hibitual YouTuber, a contortionist, a majician, and a real comedian! I'm entertained every night. I rarely even talk-- and you know that's a . They already gave me the nickname Phone Liason because I talk on the phone to all the dispatchers like I've known them forever. I even have a new friend at XM Radio named Chuck. Talk about Human Resources nightmare!?! This shit is like a real live circus! So far tonight we've discussed why WaWa is the best ever, everyone shared their strange joint tricks, and we had an in-depth discussion about Cracklin Oat Bran and why you 1) Shouldn't eat it because you'll shit yourself and 2) Why you should never eat anything with the word 'Crack' in it. Gotta love it! Good times...

JURY DUTY UPDATE

Hi-deee-hoe everybody! What's good? My homie Shaq hit me up and I realized that I haven't updated in a while. I've been adjusting to this overnight work schedule and it's truly kickin my ass. Hopefully, I'll be adjusted sometime soon so that I can share my adventures and funnies I've encountered. What have you all been up to? Believe that I miss you all spreading laughter throughout my day with all your hilarious sayings and terms. Hit me up! Let me know how your doing...

JURY DUTY vs. WINDOW LICKERS

You know what has to be the dumbest shit ever? When chicks have their nasty ass pictures posted with their asses and titties hangin out on their Myspace page and then you scroll down a little and they have pictures with their kids. What is that? Why? And furtherfuckinmore, who told you that shit is cute? And the guys posing without their shirts and their not even cut? Your not D'Angelo. We have already established that Myspace is the devil, but these window lickers need to stop the madness.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

It's Friday! It's Friday! It's he end of the week and the last day! I have to hit the road tonight. Shaq has recommended, in light of the crazy astronaut bitch, Huggies Supreme Overnight with Leak Guard Protection to cut down on travel time. (LMAO!) Shaq, you have truly been my expiration on this 9th day of Black History Month.

JURY DUTY: A DIP SET MOMENT

This kats are funny as hell to me. This clip is vintage Dip Set. From the break down of the right side, the strip club, Cams Bitch, and "The Plan"... these kats are straight comedy. Jim blackin out on the phone! Classic...

JURY DUTY vs. GANGSTAZ

Who told this guy he was a gangsta? I didn't know that there was a new gang called the Zesties. Look at his super ass sexy ass Glamour Shot pose ====> And even worse: His myspace page. Even though it's private, how much do you want to bet that Cashaun is one of his top 5 friends? If you ran into him in a dark alley do you think he's rob you? I highly doubt it. He'd probably ask you where you got your shoes from, look you up and down, throw glitter, and sashay his ass away. And how could I forget... would you smash?

JUDGE TITTAY IS BIZZ-ZAY

I have a lot going on with moving... so excuse the lack of updates. Tell ya twhat... yo make it up to you, I'll give you each one gift of your choice. Anything your mind can imaging! Assless chaps? It's yours! A four finger ring with your name spelled out in block letters? It yours! I'll see you all on the darkside...

JUDGE TITTAY vs. THE B.S.

Why did I get banned from FOX Television Station yesterday because I overheard my co-workers talkin shit about ME?!? Some backwards shit, right? [I didn't lose my job... so no need to be alarmed. I work for an outside vender that provides producers for the television station. My regional supervisor had my back. He knows my work ethic and put an end to the madness.] But it's messed up that the co-workers tried to turn the story around and act like they were the ones victimized. ((Note: Always inform a superior of any situation similar to these so the incident doesn't escalate.)) Good thing I'm about to transfer next week anyway. What a great way to start Black History Month. *smh*

In other B.S. News- Today is Groundhog Day. Why did my co-worker, Penis #2, ask me is today was the day the Beaver was supposed to come out! (lol!) That Groundhog ish is for the birds, though. How do they know if he saw the shadow or not? Does he talk? What if somebody is standing in his way and messes up/or makes the shadow?